Monday, September 20, 2010

12 Signs of a Reformed Ho

  I'm not judging, but most guys don't want to wife up a ho. I'm not even using the term ho as an insult. I'm just using it as an effective, quick way of describing a woman that enjoys having sex with multiple partners without a commitment. Hoes have their place in the social food chain and they play a very important role. As time passes, these hoes might be ready to settle down and stick with a single dick for a while...and that's cool...but we don't love them hoes...not right away at least. Eventually though, the ho will be able to settle down and leave their communal pussy ways in the past. Here are a few ways to identify a reformed ho:

- She has more sex tapes floating around than the entire cast of Flavor of Love

- She volunteers at the church nursery, primarily because 5 of the kids are hers anyway

- She says "This is some bullshit!" every time Project Pat's "Don't Save Her" comes on the radio.



- She tells you about how nice Maury is in person

- She has scar tissue from past rug burns

- She can eat a banana in one bite

- She insists that all 4 and a possible of her baby father's be a groomsmen in the wedding.



- She's shocked that the hotel you take her to for the honeymoon doesn't charge by the hour or have mirrors on the ceiling.

- She gets way too excited when you are willing to be seen in public with her

- She has a 'Frequent Aborter' membership at the clinic & gets every 3rd abortion free of charge

- She has a bible verse tatted on the small of her back
My Father told me I should get more in touch with the Word.
- She has a tat on her inner thigh of a sign that reads "General Admission" & one on her booty cheek with a velvet rope that reads "VIP Only"